Sunday, March 15, 2015

Off My High Horse.

"O my dove, that art in the clefts of the rock, in the secret places of the stairs, let me see thy countenance, let me hear thy voice; for sweet is thy voice, and thy countenance is comely." Songs of Solomon 2:14 ❤

(Note: this post is purely personal opinion. Don't be offended.)

Straight to the point: your testimony & your relationship with God are your top attributes.
Since I've started cosmetology school, I've caught myself getting too tied up in the worldly ways to be 'physically beautiful'. Sooo many girls these days get hair extensions, eyelash extensions, spray tans, meal plans, gym passes; anything they can to look 'perfect'. I know I have.
But I realized, all of these things were taking up so much of my time and mind that I hadn't made my testimony or relationship with God a top priority.
They should always be your top priority.

When I meet people that are not overly concerned with their physical appearance, but radiate the light of Christ in their countenance, they are absolutely stunning to me.
One should not be overly concerned with their physical appearance.

I want to marry a guy who loves God more than he loves the world. I would choose a guy with an amazing testimony over a guy who belongs on the cover of GQ any day. But you know what they say, you have to be the kind of person you want to end up with.
It's a new goal of mine to focus less on trying to look perfect and focus more on my testimony and my 'light', because I know I still have that problem.
I hope to see myself the way that God sees me, rather than the way that the world wants to see me.

So I guess all I'm trying to say is that if you're ever feeling less than beautiful - if you're ever upset because you don't feel like you fit in with today's ridiculous standards:
The strength of your testimony & your relationship with God are the only things about yourself you can REALLY control.

Keepin' it short, love you all
xo Zo ❤

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

The Road to Heaven - Tyler Robinson ❤

"But there is a resurrection, therefore the grave hath no victory, and the sting of death is swallowed up in Christ. He is the light and the life of the world; yea, a light that is endless, that can never be darkened; yea, and also a life which is endless, that there can be no more death." Mosiah 16:8-9 ❤

It's been two years, today.

I met Tyler Robinson when I was the new kid in our 4th grade class. He was always goofy, bubbly, the happiest and kindest in the room. I'm tempted to share all of the crazy memories him and I made in our years of friendship, but I want to focus more on the impact he made during his later years.

When I found out that Tyler had cancer,  we were both sophomores in high school. I remember how surreal it felt; cancer had been fictional to me up to that point in my life. He missed our entire junior year of high school, though, and part of our senior year.
We'd visit him, of course. And he seemed no different, other than his lack of hair. He smiled and laughed and joked, pulling the 'cancer card' occasionally. ie:
   "Hey will you grab that for me?"
   "No, get it yourself...."
   "But I have cancer."
   "OK LOVE YOU"
Funniest kid I think I know.

He was declared cancer free during our senior year, and he came back to school. Seeing him in the halls again was an unreal kind of happiness! As Dan Reynolds once said, Tyler has a positivity that fills a room.

Friday, March 1st: standing with him after school, he had his hat on - covering his hairless head - as always. A teacher walked by and told him to take it off, and he smiled and nodded, acting as if he would. We asked why he hadn't pulled the 'cancer card' like he sometimes did. He said that he liked that teacher too much and would have felt bad -- he was always thinking of others.
He said he felt kind of sick. We didn't think too much of it.

Saturday, March 2nd: my friend and I were getting ready to crash our rival school's prom. I called Tyler and his best friend, Chad, over and over, hoping they'd be our dates. They never answered. We went about the rest of our night without a second thought.

Sunday, March 3rd: I found out at church. Someone said he'd had a seizure the night before and was now if a coma; he wasn't expected to wake up. Once again, surreal. Tyler wasn't going to die, there was no way. I left church early with two of my friends and we rushed to the hospital where we were told we could visit him. 
His eyes were closed, but he was breathing. His fingers would sometimes move. I had full hope that he would wake up; miracles happen every day.
People were saying 'rest in peace' in their posts on social media, but he was still breathing. They took him off of life support, still breathing. Snoring, even, while in a coma. What a Tyler thing to do ;)

Monday, March 4th: a little after three in the morning, Tyler stopped breathing.

For some reason, I still thought it was necessary to go to school that day. I looked a little rough, to say the least, and I cried the whole day long. Half way through the day, I realized that Tyler would not act this way over his death, so why should I? And THAT IS THE MOMENT something in me changed.

I realized right then, that in Tyler's time of trial, he found healing in making other people happy. He never sought after attention or pity. He had confidence and optimism, he never came off as dramatic, and I decided I wanted to be just like him. I hate that it took him passing away for me to have this change of heart, but I can testify that he was a missionary for me even after he left this earth, and he continues to bring me closer to Christ.

After his passing, I once was at his house with his mom. She shared with me parts of his patriarchal blessing that had not 'come to pass' while he was here. She told me that she knows those things will still happen for Tyler, but in a different way than expected. She is the strongest woman I have ever met in my entire existence, and I admire how willfully she leaned on her testimony during such a hard time.

She shared with me a quote that says,
"In the midst of adversity, lies opportunity."
(Or something like that)

In the midst of Tyler's trial, he found the opportunity to spread a light that continues to glow. He touched people's hearts who continue to pass that light on in memory of him.

In the midst of the Robinson's trial of him passing, they found the opportunity to be the ones who spread that light. The band, Imagine Dragons, and Tyler's family stated the Tyler Robinson Foundation which helps make a difference for families who are affected by childhood cancer. Cancer sucks, but Tyler somehow turned it into something positive.

Since then I've tried to live in such a way that, if I were to simply not wake up in the morning, hopefully my life was not led in vain. The impact that one person can have on this world absolutely blows my mind. I cannot even thank Ty enough for the impact he had on me, and the impact that he still has on my heart every single day.

Tyler was, and still is, like sunshine - everyone would agree. He found ways to laugh when expected to cry, and he could make anyone smile when they thought they had no reason to. I'll always always love that kid, because his big heart touched mine.

I hope to never take anyone for granted another day in my life.

Love you all lots,
xo Zo ❤


CHECK THE LAST PICTURE TO SEE WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY TO HELP ❤❤❤